Stop the burning!

This is how I feel at this moment.

See it's burning me to hold onto this
I know this is something I gotta do
But that don't mean I want to
What I'm trying to say is that I-love-you I just
I feel like this is coming to an end
And its better for me to let it go now than hold on and hurt you
I gotta let it burn

It's gonna burn for me to say this
But it's coming from my heart
It's been a long time coming
But we done been fell apart
Really wanna work this out
But I don't think you're gonna change ya
I do but you don't
Think it's best we go our separate ways
Tell me why I should stay in this relationship
When I'm hurting baby, I ain't happy baby
Plus theres so many other things I gotta deal with
I think that you should let it burn

When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cause the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
You know that it was through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

Sendin' pages I ain't supposed to
Got somebody here but I want you
Cause the feeling ain't the same find myself
Callin' her your name
Ladies tell me do you understand?
Now all my fellas do you feel my pain?
It's the way I feel
I know I made a mistake
Now it's too late
I know she ain't coming back
What I gotta do now
To get my shorty back
Oh oh oh oh
Man I don't know what I'm gonna do
Without my boo
You've been gone for too long
It's been fifty-eleven days, um-teen hours
I'mma be burnin' till you return (let it burn)

When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cause the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn (let it burn, let it burn, you gonna learn)
Let it burn (gotta let it burn)
Gotta let it burn

Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
you know that it was through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

I'm twisted cause one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (oh)
I'm twisted cause one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (yeah)

So many days, so many hours
I'm still burnin' till you return

When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cause the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
You know that it was through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

Being a kid is like being drunk, everyone remembers all the stupid stuff you did but you.

Remember the days of playing outside until your mom yelled for you to get your butt in the house? Or watching those awesome Saturday morning cartoons? Or even playing Sailor Moon with your favorite cousins? The days when all you had to worry about was which cereal you were going to eat in the morning. I miss those days. When I was younger, I couldn't wait to grow up. I thought it was going to be the best. Boy was I mistaken. Don't get me wrong being an adult has some great perks. But there's responsibilities (other then chores) You have to work, learn to cook, pay bills. I have a good job, my boss is the most amazing boss ever! But working sucks. Im not doing something that I absolutely love so its hard to force myself to go. Not to mention all  the people and drama that I have to deal with on a daily basis. When you grow up the drama gets worse I think. If you claim to be a mature adult then why do you not act like it? That above all bugs the heck out of me. Dont start petty drama, act like a child and then claim that you're more mature and above everyone else!
But I digress. To do what I want I have to go to school. And the worst part about going to school now is there is no recess! It seems like school will never end. But I keep telling myself it will be worth it in the end.
There is a saddness that I have been feeling lately. Is it depression? Is it seasonal? Or could it be Im having myself a good old pity party? Maybe a little bit of all of those. My health sucks. I try not to complain because its not diabetes or cancer or something serious like that. But it stll sucks. And whats worse is it seems like I am never getting better... and Im FAT!!!! I have no motivation to go to the gym or take care of myself. Someone please come slap me! Maybe shake me a little? I really am tired of being anti social, anti healthy and just plain anti! I'm too young to be this unhappy right? Perhaps the next time I'm sitting at home wallowing in my self pitty I should take a look at my life and decide what the freak Im doing with my life and figure out what I can change to love life again. Yes!
Oh and Im more then just boobs! So stop staring at my chest perves. Just thought I'd sneak that in there :)

Life sucks. It is full of trials that are meant to test us. These tests can ultimately make us stronger in the end. But you still wonder "why me?". It seems like the bad news has just kept coming. My family recently suffered a loss. One of my cousins died for no good reason. After attending the services I realized just how important family is. I may not be as close to my family as I would like but if any of them needed anything I would be there, even if that meant lending an ear or a shoulder to cry on. As they have shown me.  There are horrible people in this world that have no regard for others. No body is perfect and I realize that but how can people live with themselves  after knowingly hurting someone?
My friend got some horrible news as well. He has been strong through out this whole thing and I admire him. I hope you know my friends I will always be there for you! No matter what has happened in the past. I love you all dearly and I hold a special place for all of you in my heart.